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Date: July 12, 2017 09:13:19 am Title: Chapter 1

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Date: April 19, 2017 08:22:49 am Title: Chapter 1

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Reviewer: cai20160118 Signed [Report This]
Date: January 18, 2016 07:22:23 am Title: Chapter 1

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Reviewer: sureall adept Signed [Report This]
Date: March 05, 2011 05:47:50 am Title: Chapter 1

the only thing i can say is very good and hope for a new chapter

Reviewer: Isaac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: February 16, 2011 02:36:16 am Title: Chapter 1

Well I forgot to rate it, and I have another question anyway. What is a beta reader? I guess that is not a question for you... but...
And now a question related to the story- well, a comment, I think hold is meant when it's a good thing, like a way to remain stable. But hole was right for that part. Still great.

Reviewer: Isaac Signed [Report This]
Date: February 16, 2011 02:30:36 am Title: Chapter 2

REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD. I'm so disappointed that there isn't another chapter yet!
If you want constructive criticism then I guess... was wondering, if it was a lie detector test, why didn't you just tell the truth? Then again, that would ruin the story. Great work!

Reviewer: Vorlan Signed [Report This]
Date: January 26, 2009 10:34:53 am Title: Chapter 1


I can if you want :) I'm happy to help out!

Author's Response: Cool beans! PM me and i will send you my email!

Reviewer: Vorlan Signed [Report This]
Date: January 25, 2009 03:46:46 am Title: Chapter 1

Made a mistake myself :) That was meant to be "hold" not "hod"

Author's Response: thank you for your review. Would you like to be my beta-reader?

Reviewer: Vorlan Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: January 25, 2009 03:44:52 am Title: Chapter 1

I quite like the concept of this. It's good to see the characters in a slightly different light this time.
I didn't notice any spelling/grammatical mistakes so that's good.
Only possible slip I noticed is "He raised his eye-brows. Apparently, I had just dug a deeper hold for myself with my sarcasm. " - was this meant to be digging a hole for myself rather than hod?

Overall a good start, I like the concept and the dialogue particulally. I look forward to seeing how this continues. :)

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